Over the past week, since my excommunication from my church, I've been trying to gather my thoughts and feelings about it. I'm still a bit speechless, stunned, and numb but also incredibly sad and a little bit angry.
But I think somewhere in the big mess of emotion I am lost in, I have located where that niggling feeling is dwelling.
It's the fact that our country has an issue of inequality on their hands. You would expect that the church would be leading the way in any issue of inequality, that it would be the Christians who push for justice and equality, that we would be able to rely on churches, at least, to be accepting and loving among our selfish society. It's all we bang on about in sermons, when we tell people about Jesus, when we go about our outreach work; we tell everyone about the love, acceptance and fellowship that Christianity offers.
But in reality, the Church is perceived by society as a barrier to LGB equality. By producing petitions against same-sex marriage, by kicking people out of church, by condemning all LGB people, Christians are not practicing these values they teach. Instead, the acceptance and love is being promoted by secular groups and fellowship is hard to find for LGB Christians.
Thanks to the media, and a few influential religious bigots, our country has become a society of 'us' and 'them', there is an increasingly bipolar view of the church being collectively against homosexuality and the rest of society being for. It doesn't take a genius to see who comes out looking bad.
'Society' has no reason to accept LGB people, yet it does anyway. Christians have many reasons to accept LGB people, yet it doesn't.
So that is what bothers me the most, it's the fact that society is one step ahead of the church, it's standing there encouraging the church to move forwards, like a mother encouraging her child to take its first step. All the while the church is standing there, like a stubborn child with its arms crossed, refusing to move, thus frustrating everyone and making itself look like a defiant so and so.
The church needs to stop preaching about things it doesn't practice. Which sounds harsh, but I spent 2 months at a church, listening to endless sermons about loving others, celebrating the people God made us to be, being encouraged and built up, and affirmed in my identity as a Christian, only for every word they preached to become empty words the moment the church failed to put them into practice.
Can we please end this massive hypocrisy in churches? Can the church please stop pretending it is something it isn't? Can we turn churches from places that exile you to places that unconditionally accept you?
And to those of us who want to be Christians who practice what we preach, who love and accept in the same unconditional way that Jesus did, it's time for us to take a stand, to let the rest of the country know that Christians do lobby for equality, and that there is a place for everybody in God's family.
Disclaimer: in my polarisation of views I have obviously omitted mention of the positions of other religions. This is because it's the church that seems to have drawn all this attention to itself, and intervened with politics on the premise that we are a 'christian country'. So I'm not saying Christians are responsible for all opposition against equality for gay people (or that all Christians are responsible!), but just that their voice of opposition is coming across worryingly loudly.
Thursday, 12 July 2012
Sunday, 8 July 2012
they just p*ssed on their own parade
Today I went to church.
Today I was told I am no longer welcome due to the fact I do not see a problem with same-sex marriage.
I was welcomed at this church, I joined a small group, I was offered opportunities to serve.
Then I told them my views.
Then my eligibility for membership was invalidated, my beliefs were undermined and my integrity questioned.
Last time I checked, there wasn't a vetting system for who is allowed to be a part of the Christian family.
Last time I checked, people weren't kicked out of church for sinning. However, yes, I am unrepentant of intending to have a same-sex relationship, but I'm pretty sure the woman bishops are unrepentant of being bishops. God convicts me of things I do wrong, I could list a thousand sins I've committed this week, I know they are wrong even when they seem right, because I have a relationship with God and he shows me the things I need to turn against.
I'm a strong Christian, I will find a new church which is more accepting... but what about the people on the fringes of church? This is the impression we are sending out to everyone that doesn't fit in our box, or doesn't live up to this invented Christian standard- we are telling them that they aren't welcome, that they are confined to the outskirts of our community. And then we complain, as Christians, about how corrupt and promiscuous the gay culture is... and we forget the role we played in pushing them to it.
The vicar at this church vindicated himself by allocating blame on church structure and politics- "it's because we're a Church of England church" he said. But it's not, I attended a church in Sheffield where the vicar supported me, and all other same-sex couples, and he was Church of England. Yes, there is contention in the CofE stance on the issue but it does not have to be used as a veil for individual homophobia.
We are sending out a sad, sad message to the not-yet-converted of the world, and not only is this message sad but it's contradictory and conflicted. What I know of God, and what I am taught of about him (by Christians, vicars, church leaders, Jesus himself) is his grace, his acceptance and his love for us. I am taught to love others, to love God, to serve him and to help the poor and needy. I am taught of joy and forgiveness, of heaven and hope. Christians have this wonderful parade of God's amazing characteristics, and then they go and piss all over it with their condemnation and judgement.
Today I was told I am no longer welcome due to the fact I do not see a problem with same-sex marriage.
I was welcomed at this church, I joined a small group, I was offered opportunities to serve.
Then I told them my views.
Then my eligibility for membership was invalidated, my beliefs were undermined and my integrity questioned.
Last time I checked, there wasn't a vetting system for who is allowed to be a part of the Christian family.
Last time I checked, people weren't kicked out of church for sinning. However, yes, I am unrepentant of intending to have a same-sex relationship, but I'm pretty sure the woman bishops are unrepentant of being bishops. God convicts me of things I do wrong, I could list a thousand sins I've committed this week, I know they are wrong even when they seem right, because I have a relationship with God and he shows me the things I need to turn against.
I'm a strong Christian, I will find a new church which is more accepting... but what about the people on the fringes of church? This is the impression we are sending out to everyone that doesn't fit in our box, or doesn't live up to this invented Christian standard- we are telling them that they aren't welcome, that they are confined to the outskirts of our community. And then we complain, as Christians, about how corrupt and promiscuous the gay culture is... and we forget the role we played in pushing them to it.
The vicar at this church vindicated himself by allocating blame on church structure and politics- "it's because we're a Church of England church" he said. But it's not, I attended a church in Sheffield where the vicar supported me, and all other same-sex couples, and he was Church of England. Yes, there is contention in the CofE stance on the issue but it does not have to be used as a veil for individual homophobia.
We are sending out a sad, sad message to the not-yet-converted of the world, and not only is this message sad but it's contradictory and conflicted. What I know of God, and what I am taught of about him (by Christians, vicars, church leaders, Jesus himself) is his grace, his acceptance and his love for us. I am taught to love others, to love God, to serve him and to help the poor and needy. I am taught of joy and forgiveness, of heaven and hope. Christians have this wonderful parade of God's amazing characteristics, and then they go and piss all over it with their condemnation and judgement.
Friday, 8 June 2012
Listening, language and leadership
(Sorry for yet another tragically long post, I'll bold the important parts for quick reading)
If fundamentalist Christians and members of the gay rights lobby share one thing in common, it's their claim on the word 'marginalised'. Christians claim to be marginalised in today's society, for example when they are not allowed to wear crosses at their workplace. Gay people claim to be marginalised when they are exempt from marriage, or when they are discriminated against.
I have claimed, in the past, to have felt 'marginalised' within the church as a non-straight Christian. Yet the church has often claimed it doesn't marginalise people- churches are surely inclusive, and surely Jesus didn't shy away from being around sinners and the despised (bla bla bla). Yes, this is true in my experience. I have been out in public and been called a 'dyke' by a random stranger yet I have never walked into a church and been called names by the people in the pews. I have never, I can categorically say, experienced any sort of direct, overt, face to face discrimination over my less than clear sexual orientation within the walls of a church.
But... yup there's a but coming.
But something I have learnt, is that marginalisation does not have a face that can be seen in the same way discrimination or hate crimes do. No, to experience life at the margins of society, or an institution or a family or any sort of group, is to experience something subtle, something insidious. But not something malicious. That's the difference between discrimination and marginalisation- the latter just happens, without us even realising we are contributing to it.
So I am going to share with you what my experience of being marginalised has been over the years because if we can identify the subtle ways it occurs, then we can work harder to stop it happening.
There are 3 areas within which the church, both as individual institutions and as the collective, perpetuate marginalisation; listening, language and leadership.
1. Listening
One of the first steps the church I used to belong to took when I 'came out' was to summon me to a meeting with the pastoral leadership team. I was reduced to tears as I sat and was told that my relationship was 'a confused friendship that had gone too far' and that me and my partner had to 'never see each other again'.
If they had listened to me, they would have known that I KNEW I wasn't simply confused- trust me, the fallout wasn't worth it simply for a bit of confusion. They would have known that asking me to depart from my lesbian lover was only going to cause me to spiral into a deep and profound depression. And when I get depressed, it gets messy.
They did not listen to the parts that mattered- my feelings, my emotions, my concerns for my mental health. All they heard was 'homosexual activity' and that was as far as they were willing to listen before dishing out their poor advice.
What happened next, was I was sent to a meeting with a member of the church who was gay. I told them that it wasn't going to help if she was celibate. I wasn't looking for an argument over whether it was right or not, I was looking for support. I met with this girl. I said "have you ever been in love?" she said "no". I felt the point of my issue was being side stepped. I was trying to tell them that I was in love, that I was struggling to reconcile that with my faith, that I was TERRIFIED of the future and of what all of this meant for me (I was only 19, for pity's sake). I needed to talk to someone who had been through that terror, someone who could understand the hurt and sadness I was feeling and who could help me find my way through that. If they had listened, they would have known a meeting like that would only make me more confused, and more stubborn.
What happened next? I was sent to a Christian counsellor, part funded by my church. On the face of it, this was supportive and inclusive. Underneath the insidious marginalisation was occurring. Week upon week I met with this woman who didn't listen to a word I said. She would spend the hour praying for my lost soul, that I would stop being gay. Once, I brought her a bit of writing I had done talking about things I felt in words I could not verbalise. She said she would read it. The next week she hadn't read it. For the next 3 sessions I asked her if she had read it yet and she promised she would read it by the next session. She never did read what I wrote. She never listened enough to hear what I felt. It was all about her own agenda.
I cannot express to you enough, how important it is to LISTEN. I was a naive 19 year old, I was confused and I was hurting. When I feel like no-one is listening to my feelings, I automatically do things that make them listen. In the past this has been self-destructive. That time, I ended up rebelling. The year following all of these things, I went crazy, I did whatever I wanted, I did many of the things I always promised myself I would never do. I have to take responsibility for my actions, but I also wonder if there could have been a straighter path back to happiness if people in my church had focused on the issues at hand, if they had listened rather than judged, if rather than sidelining me they had embraced me and held onto me. All these ways they reacted, because they weren't really listening, pushed me away further and further until I was completely lost and on the outside.
(By the way, they subtly sidelined me until I told them I was leaving at which point they waved me goodbye on my merry way and I found a new church where the vicar LISTENED and supported me in the way I needed rather than the way he saw as correct).
2. Language
Last weekend I was at a Christian event. I went with my 'partner' and we were overtly gay. We publicly cuddled and pecked lips and walked around arm in arm. No-one said a word to us. No-one shouted nasty things, gave us dirty looks (that we saw anyway!) or acted in any threatening way. For almost the entire weekend, I felt included, and I felt we were legitimately there as a couple alongside the straight couples.
Except, there was subtle marginalisation. Three particular moments made my radar alarm. Firstly, in the 'marketplace' there was a stand for the organisation 'Care for the Family'. There was no overt banner ousting homosexuals, but they had a book stand. Lots of books, magazines, images and projections of the traditional family, images of a 2.4 nuclear family, with a mother and father. Another book I flicked through from another stand had a chapter devoted to explaining why being gay is wrong. A scour of the makeshift bookshop in a little marquee produced more books all geared towards a traditional family. Me and my partner have been having a bit of light hearted banter recently about our 'family', 'deciding' on our kids names, picturing our wedding, chatting about our child rearing approaches. If we end up together, we intend to be a very Christian family, we intend to raise church going children, to do missions work, to serve in our church. But I did not see one single book, not even one little indication anywhere, of any sort of support for us. Of any image or line in a book that includes us as a legitimate family. Don't get me wrong, these books do exist (http://www.livingitout.com/) but their presence is strangely absent from large scale Christian events.
Secondly, I bought a Christian magazine from a stand, mainly out of interest of what constitutes content for a Christian woman demographic. A few pages in, an advert for the Coalition for Marriage petition. That bloody thing gets EVERYWHERE!
Thirdly, one of the hosts was talking about God and stuff (funny that) and he talked a bit about family and marriage, I can't remember the exact wording but they were passing comments, mainly used as examples, and were side points to what he was actually talking about. The issue I had, maybe a bit pedantic, but he referred only to 'husbands' and 'wives' and spoke as though the only relationship he had ever heard of was a marriage between a man and a woman. I'm not saying I expect him to be all PC and to add on 'and people in same- sex relationships' or to talk about it as tho it's all part and parcel. But, what got me was the complete nonchalance, the absolute lack of realisation that what he was saying was only applicable to a minority (assuming his language also marginalised single people, widows, or any other set up in which the people in it can't relate to his words). In general, we need to be careful not to exclude people in our choice of words.
So, my point being, we were never overtly pushed to the sidelines, but there was an underlying assumption that cropped up time and time again over the weekend, that we were at a Christian event and ergo, we were straight and conventional in our relationships. The entire language used in the event and the one-sided representation of family life made it seem as though they were pretending people like us didn't exist, and certainly weren't there among them. Next time you are listening to a sermon, listening to the congregation chat, listening to the Christian radio, watching Christian TV, reading a magazine, at a Christian event, doing anything where Christians hold the dominant voice, I dare you, to listen to the language they are using, and you'll see this assumption hidden within Christian discourse. And when you do, think of how it sounds to your friends who don't fit the box.
3. Leadership
All of this falls under the remit of leadership. Their influence has run beside every experience I've had of marginalisation. We are held back from moving forward on the issue of same-sex marriage largely because of the voice of the leadership of the collective church. I'm not asking for a U-turn on the issue, but I am asking that leaders set an example of listening to the marginalised, of considering us rather than pretending we don't exist, of crushing these assumptions that we all fit in a perfect little conventional Christian box.
I read in the papers about what some Bishop has said most recently about same-sex marriage, I watch them all from afar debating the importance of protecting the definition of marriage, I see their signatures on petitions against same-sex marriage. Leaders in the church are outspoken on the issue. But are they listening as much as they are talking?
This subtle sidelining of gay Christians won't end until leaders stop perpetuating it.
Somewhere along the way it's become unacceptable to actively discriminate against gay people, or to treat them badly, but it's still OK to push them out and to allow them to live on the margins of church life, stopping them from being fully included through exclusive language and an inability to listen and support them.
So, don't assume that just because you aren't standing at the church gate with a sign saying 'God Hates Fags' that you aren't pushing gay people away from your church, whether you are a fellow member or a leader. On one hand, being exclusive doesn't mean physically turning gay people away at they church door, on the other hand, being inclusive doesn't mean standing with a clipboard rallying support for gay marriage and herding all the homosexuals through your church door. I'd argue that all it takes to stop pushing homosexual Christians out of the church is to listen a little more to their needs, and to respond in a language they can understand.
If fundamentalist Christians and members of the gay rights lobby share one thing in common, it's their claim on the word 'marginalised'. Christians claim to be marginalised in today's society, for example when they are not allowed to wear crosses at their workplace. Gay people claim to be marginalised when they are exempt from marriage, or when they are discriminated against.
I have claimed, in the past, to have felt 'marginalised' within the church as a non-straight Christian. Yet the church has often claimed it doesn't marginalise people- churches are surely inclusive, and surely Jesus didn't shy away from being around sinners and the despised (bla bla bla). Yes, this is true in my experience. I have been out in public and been called a 'dyke' by a random stranger yet I have never walked into a church and been called names by the people in the pews. I have never, I can categorically say, experienced any sort of direct, overt, face to face discrimination over my less than clear sexual orientation within the walls of a church.
But... yup there's a but coming.
But something I have learnt, is that marginalisation does not have a face that can be seen in the same way discrimination or hate crimes do. No, to experience life at the margins of society, or an institution or a family or any sort of group, is to experience something subtle, something insidious. But not something malicious. That's the difference between discrimination and marginalisation- the latter just happens, without us even realising we are contributing to it.
So I am going to share with you what my experience of being marginalised has been over the years because if we can identify the subtle ways it occurs, then we can work harder to stop it happening.
There are 3 areas within which the church, both as individual institutions and as the collective, perpetuate marginalisation; listening, language and leadership.
1. Listening
One of the first steps the church I used to belong to took when I 'came out' was to summon me to a meeting with the pastoral leadership team. I was reduced to tears as I sat and was told that my relationship was 'a confused friendship that had gone too far' and that me and my partner had to 'never see each other again'.
If they had listened to me, they would have known that I KNEW I wasn't simply confused- trust me, the fallout wasn't worth it simply for a bit of confusion. They would have known that asking me to depart from my lesbian lover was only going to cause me to spiral into a deep and profound depression. And when I get depressed, it gets messy.
They did not listen to the parts that mattered- my feelings, my emotions, my concerns for my mental health. All they heard was 'homosexual activity' and that was as far as they were willing to listen before dishing out their poor advice.
What happened next, was I was sent to a meeting with a member of the church who was gay. I told them that it wasn't going to help if she was celibate. I wasn't looking for an argument over whether it was right or not, I was looking for support. I met with this girl. I said "have you ever been in love?" she said "no". I felt the point of my issue was being side stepped. I was trying to tell them that I was in love, that I was struggling to reconcile that with my faith, that I was TERRIFIED of the future and of what all of this meant for me (I was only 19, for pity's sake). I needed to talk to someone who had been through that terror, someone who could understand the hurt and sadness I was feeling and who could help me find my way through that. If they had listened, they would have known a meeting like that would only make me more confused, and more stubborn.
What happened next? I was sent to a Christian counsellor, part funded by my church. On the face of it, this was supportive and inclusive. Underneath the insidious marginalisation was occurring. Week upon week I met with this woman who didn't listen to a word I said. She would spend the hour praying for my lost soul, that I would stop being gay. Once, I brought her a bit of writing I had done talking about things I felt in words I could not verbalise. She said she would read it. The next week she hadn't read it. For the next 3 sessions I asked her if she had read it yet and she promised she would read it by the next session. She never did read what I wrote. She never listened enough to hear what I felt. It was all about her own agenda.
I cannot express to you enough, how important it is to LISTEN. I was a naive 19 year old, I was confused and I was hurting. When I feel like no-one is listening to my feelings, I automatically do things that make them listen. In the past this has been self-destructive. That time, I ended up rebelling. The year following all of these things, I went crazy, I did whatever I wanted, I did many of the things I always promised myself I would never do. I have to take responsibility for my actions, but I also wonder if there could have been a straighter path back to happiness if people in my church had focused on the issues at hand, if they had listened rather than judged, if rather than sidelining me they had embraced me and held onto me. All these ways they reacted, because they weren't really listening, pushed me away further and further until I was completely lost and on the outside.
(By the way, they subtly sidelined me until I told them I was leaving at which point they waved me goodbye on my merry way and I found a new church where the vicar LISTENED and supported me in the way I needed rather than the way he saw as correct).
2. Language
Last weekend I was at a Christian event. I went with my 'partner' and we were overtly gay. We publicly cuddled and pecked lips and walked around arm in arm. No-one said a word to us. No-one shouted nasty things, gave us dirty looks (that we saw anyway!) or acted in any threatening way. For almost the entire weekend, I felt included, and I felt we were legitimately there as a couple alongside the straight couples.
Except, there was subtle marginalisation. Three particular moments made my radar alarm. Firstly, in the 'marketplace' there was a stand for the organisation 'Care for the Family'. There was no overt banner ousting homosexuals, but they had a book stand. Lots of books, magazines, images and projections of the traditional family, images of a 2.4 nuclear family, with a mother and father. Another book I flicked through from another stand had a chapter devoted to explaining why being gay is wrong. A scour of the makeshift bookshop in a little marquee produced more books all geared towards a traditional family. Me and my partner have been having a bit of light hearted banter recently about our 'family', 'deciding' on our kids names, picturing our wedding, chatting about our child rearing approaches. If we end up together, we intend to be a very Christian family, we intend to raise church going children, to do missions work, to serve in our church. But I did not see one single book, not even one little indication anywhere, of any sort of support for us. Of any image or line in a book that includes us as a legitimate family. Don't get me wrong, these books do exist (http://www.livingitout.com/) but their presence is strangely absent from large scale Christian events.
Secondly, I bought a Christian magazine from a stand, mainly out of interest of what constitutes content for a Christian woman demographic. A few pages in, an advert for the Coalition for Marriage petition. That bloody thing gets EVERYWHERE!
Thirdly, one of the hosts was talking about God and stuff (funny that) and he talked a bit about family and marriage, I can't remember the exact wording but they were passing comments, mainly used as examples, and were side points to what he was actually talking about. The issue I had, maybe a bit pedantic, but he referred only to 'husbands' and 'wives' and spoke as though the only relationship he had ever heard of was a marriage between a man and a woman. I'm not saying I expect him to be all PC and to add on 'and people in same- sex relationships' or to talk about it as tho it's all part and parcel. But, what got me was the complete nonchalance, the absolute lack of realisation that what he was saying was only applicable to a minority (assuming his language also marginalised single people, widows, or any other set up in which the people in it can't relate to his words). In general, we need to be careful not to exclude people in our choice of words.
So, my point being, we were never overtly pushed to the sidelines, but there was an underlying assumption that cropped up time and time again over the weekend, that we were at a Christian event and ergo, we were straight and conventional in our relationships. The entire language used in the event and the one-sided representation of family life made it seem as though they were pretending people like us didn't exist, and certainly weren't there among them. Next time you are listening to a sermon, listening to the congregation chat, listening to the Christian radio, watching Christian TV, reading a magazine, at a Christian event, doing anything where Christians hold the dominant voice, I dare you, to listen to the language they are using, and you'll see this assumption hidden within Christian discourse. And when you do, think of how it sounds to your friends who don't fit the box.
3. Leadership
All of this falls under the remit of leadership. Their influence has run beside every experience I've had of marginalisation. We are held back from moving forward on the issue of same-sex marriage largely because of the voice of the leadership of the collective church. I'm not asking for a U-turn on the issue, but I am asking that leaders set an example of listening to the marginalised, of considering us rather than pretending we don't exist, of crushing these assumptions that we all fit in a perfect little conventional Christian box.
I read in the papers about what some Bishop has said most recently about same-sex marriage, I watch them all from afar debating the importance of protecting the definition of marriage, I see their signatures on petitions against same-sex marriage. Leaders in the church are outspoken on the issue. But are they listening as much as they are talking?
This subtle sidelining of gay Christians won't end until leaders stop perpetuating it.
Somewhere along the way it's become unacceptable to actively discriminate against gay people, or to treat them badly, but it's still OK to push them out and to allow them to live on the margins of church life, stopping them from being fully included through exclusive language and an inability to listen and support them.
So, don't assume that just because you aren't standing at the church gate with a sign saying 'God Hates Fags' that you aren't pushing gay people away from your church, whether you are a fellow member or a leader. On one hand, being exclusive doesn't mean physically turning gay people away at they church door, on the other hand, being inclusive doesn't mean standing with a clipboard rallying support for gay marriage and herding all the homosexuals through your church door. I'd argue that all it takes to stop pushing homosexual Christians out of the church is to listen a little more to their needs, and to respond in a language they can understand.
Ignorant Daily Mail Readers
A summary of this rather long post:
* Disclaimer for why I am spacial-ly close enough to the Daily Mail to allude to an article in it
* Description of its ridiculous views
* Mention of its latest article on same-sex marriage
* Evidence of these ridiculous views in the reader comments section on said article
* Brief explosion of anger at how ignorant DM readers areI have a confession to make. It's really rather embarrassing but anything is justified in the name of research, right? My confession is, that I am a Daily Mail reader. I know, I know, you may now lose some of your respect for me, and label me as a racist, right-wing, ignorant fool but before you do, let me try and explain.
I read the DM because it is often light hearted and fun and there's nothing better to brighten up your morning than a story about a dog who can sing the alphabet, 3 million pictures of people drowning in the rain, and a list of the next 1,000 things to cause cancer which becomes so laughable that it's all a good laugh. It also saves me a fortune in buying trashy celeb magazines, as my teenage-like interest in which celeb has got fat this month is quenched by the latest DM offering.
Every article in the DM is 'approved' or 'disapproved' by a barometer style comments system. So people who post comments affirming the generic DM reader view is 'green arrowed' meaning everyone agrees, and a comment that defies DM reader ideology is 'red arrowed' so a quick glance at the best rated and worst rated comments will give you a clear idea of which way is up.
In case you are not so well acquainted with the Daily Mail, I will give you a brief outline. The general (right-wingness of it) view is that anything that involves the state 'discriminating' against us British people is despicable. Cue many articles lavishing hatred upon immigrants (who are stealing all our jobs and primary school places), social workers/doctors/judges/policemen (who are stealing our freedom by imposing laws upon us), and people on benefits (who are stealing all our hard-earned money).
Anything that affirms Britain as a nation is revered, cue endless stories about the Royal Family, the sacredness of the Olympics and the Jubilee, and many inane stories about insignificant British people doing unremarkable things.
And then there are the things which the readers can't quite decide on, which leads to quite some contradiction (even more contradictory than when they ran endless stories about the devil child rioters whilst simultaneously blaming the entire thing on the government).
Christianity is one of these contradictions, this one all depends on who they are pitted against. DM readers are all for our 'Christian country' when it is being compromised by another minority group or state authority but as soon as a Christian is reported as compromising individual rights, they are villianised and quickly disowned.
David Cameron is another contradiction. When he does something right, it's all 'hail the conservatives' but when he does something controversial it's all 'why is this man in charge of our precious party?!'
Anyway... the point of that long winded introduction is to highlight today's Daily Mail daily offering on the same-sex marriage debate.
"Most homosexuals indifferent to David Cameron's drive for gay marriage" proclaims the headline. DM, always the vehicle of ignorance.
Firstly, this survey was commissioned by "Catholic Voices" a group CLEARLY with an agenda, but this bias is overlooked.
Secondly, only 541 people were asked, who self-reported their sexuality. No controls on who was really filling in this questionnaire, not to mention 541 people could capture a very specific demographic.
Thirdly, this whole issue has become incredibly complex, with political, religious and homophobic agendas all over the place. People are not understanding the issue at hand. I don't say that condescendingly, I have been following this debate closely yet am constantly confused about what the debate actually is. But the ignorance is self evident. Here is an example:
KEY PROPOSALS FOR SAME SEX MARRIAGE:
"no changes are proposed to religious marriages. This will continue to only be legally possible between a man and a woman;" (http://www.homeoffice.gov.uk/equalities/lgbt/)
What is this guy smoking?! Why is he banging on about same-sex marriage meaning having to get married in a church? THE PROPOSALS WILL NOT MEAN GAY COUPLES CAN GET MARRIED IN A CHURCH, IN FACT THEY ARE STILL EXPLICITLY BANNED FROM DOING SO. It makes me so, so mad that this ignorant man is supporting this equally ignorant DM article. 10 equally ignorant people 'green-arrowed' this comment.
So, this is why I hate the DM, it perpetuates ignorance on so many levels about so many things. The readers hate things for the sake of hating them, and can't even stick to their convictions when a shinier dartboard for their hate filled arrows is placed in their way.
But... I have a morbid fascination with reading it (a bit like how you can't not look at a car crash), because the ignorance is just so astounding it isn't even real.
And just one more disclaimer: I'm not affiliating myself with any particular political view in this post, don't assume I am some Labour lover just cause I find DM readers overzealous with their right wing views.
Saturday, 12 May 2012
Continuing the quest
So I have been quietly (for the most part) following the recent furore over same-sex marriage.
- Of particular amusement has been the back and forth between @drpetersaunders and a bunch of mainly non-christians who have been offended by his "homosceptism" (his pathetic attempt at vocabulary which translates as homophobic to the rest of us)
- Of particular excitement has been President Obama's speech in which he claims support for same- sex marriage
- Of particular worry is that the Coalition for Marriage petition has over half a million signatures
- Of particular interest has been Out and Around a website that follows two lesbians as they trot around the globe investigating the LGBT community all across the world
I have been trying so hard not to get too defensive over this whole debate. No, honestly, even at church they have a copy of the C4M petition on the wall, and although I wanted to a) get out of there as fast as possible, or b) hunt down whoever put it there and kick some ass, I instead calmly accepted it, and decided I won't get on the defensive but will wait and find out how seriously they take that rubbish (to be fair, I am new to this church and a poster like that doesn't exactly make me feel welcome!).
So I've been attempting to stay calm, but some things really rile me. Or rather, some people's ignorance. I'd like to demonstrate some of the opinions other Christians have towards gay people, and gay Christians.
These are from a discussion about Obama's speech on the UCB radio's Facebook page (warning: it's more painful than reading the Daily Mail readers' comments):
"I wouldn't vote for them. It shows immorality"
"God created Adam and eve not Adam and Steve! I would not be voting for him if I had the chance, we must remain faithful to scripture"
"Wrong wrong wrong ! totally wrong! gays should not be aloud!"
"He's sold his soul"
"Once every man marries every man and every woman marries every woman, who is going to give birth to the babies they have to adopt? Soon human beings will go on extinct. God does not make mistake and will never make mistake to create a man in woman's body likewise a woman in a man's body. Its the devil that plays with people's mind and he is ready to take as many people to hell as he could. No one is judging but remember this is the end time - "Take heed lest ye fall"."
"if the whole world should go 'gay',in d nxt 2 centuries 4rm nw mankind will cease 2 exist!"
Of course, I have picked out only the ridiculous comments, and my favourite comment by far was from a 17 year old gay Christian who said "do you people hear yourselves?!" and I thought that sums it up really, if they could hear themselves through the ears of the people they are condemning then they might realise the poison in their words. As a side note, I love UCB a lot, just not some of the comments their listeners make, not just on this issue.
At risk of this post being too long, like most are, I shall leave you with these 2 things.
Firstly, you might enjoy (or not) Andrea Minichiello William's latest offering here
Secondly, so you don't become disillusioned about Christianity, here's some truth:
Romans 8:1-4 "If you belong to Christ Jesus, you won’t be punished. 2 The Holy Spirit will give you life that comes from Christ Jesus and will set you free from sin and death. 3 The Law of Moses cannot do this, because our selfish desires make the Law weak. But God set you free when he sent his own Son to be like us sinners and to be a sacrifice for our sin. God used Christ’s body to condemn sin. 4 He did this, so that we would do what the Law commands by obeying the Spirit instead of our own desires."
Thursday, 10 May 2012
Monday, 7 May 2012
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